I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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