every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
