i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
