I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
The best revenge is premature balding
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
You've changed since you got that strap on
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