This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
