I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Randomize
