At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I would fuck him just for his dog
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
