do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
