they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Randomize
