some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
