Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
