guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Do vagina's smell?
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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