ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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