i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
