He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
