Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Sponge bath it is.
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
