dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
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