You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
pop tarts are not kleenex
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
