I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
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