She announced her abortion via fbk
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Randomize