What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
so much tequila, so little girl.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
