I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
