dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
