Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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