Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
