Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
