My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
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