What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Randomize
