so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Randomize