it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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