Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
