Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
