You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
