she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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