she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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