my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
just found out that she named her cat after me.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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