3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
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