Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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