she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
