Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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