i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
You did what with his pubic hair?
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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