Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
