Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
