do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
He's on the porch naked. Help.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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