All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
