We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
