Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
