Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
