lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
it hurts more in the daytime
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize