We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
